Skip to content

Making A Good First Impression With Your Novel Manuscript, by Phillipa Fioretti

I’ve always found the giving of writing advice mildly uncomfortable, because implicit in the act of giving advice is the assumption that you have identified a writing problem and now cleverly avoid it. Well, that’s not necessarily the case. I can point out the hole in the road to others and still fall in it myself. Easily.

A recent experience reminded me of this. I had two manuscripts to read and comment on. Both arrived at the same time. I read the synopses and first couple of paragraphs of both before putting them down and getting on with my own work. I made a snap judgement on which was the best manuscript based on what little I’d read. I got it wrong.

When I eventually sat down and read both carefully I realised the one I assumed was the weakest was in fact very strong. I’d been ready to write it off based on that cursory reading. I read it all the way through because I’d been asked to, but if I’d been an agent or publisher I would have tossed it into the reject tray. A shiver went down my spine.

Everywhere – all over the Internet, in books, in workshops and wherever tall tales are told about publishers and agents, it is stressed that you have one chance to impress these overworked people and you better make damn sure everything is beyond perfect in those first paragraphs and chapters. Being of a somewhat sceptical nature I used to think such advice was an exaggeration. Or maybe I was just in denial.

It wasn’t typos that threw me off in these two manuscripts. It was lack of clarity. The writer obviously knew who they were talking about but I didn’t. There were long sentences, clumsy sentence structure and overuse of adjectives. This is a real turn off. Setting the scene and anchoring the reader is important. There is no escaping it. But an adjective before every noun is clunky. For example, and I’m just making up a sentence here…

‘The fluffy clouds above the silver sea reflected the pink light of sunset back at the small boat as it’s ragged blue sail fluttered in the light breeze.’


‘The clouds above the sea reflected the light of sunset back at the boat as its sail fluttered in the breeze.’

Both clumsy, right? But you can forgive one and not the other. We all know adverbs are to be used sparingly, and adjectives really need the same use of caution. When in doubt, take it out. Choose one object, perhaps the most significant in the sentence or paragraph, and give it a couple of adjectives. A considered use of adjectives is going to have more impact than slotting one in before every noun. And this is advice I feel I can give happily, because I do pay attention to my adjectives, perhaps more attention than I do to sentence structure.

The lesson I learned from this episode is that, yes, first impressions count for an awful lot. Time poor, overstressed publishing personnel are looking for good stories but they’re also looking for reasons to reject you. Don’t give these reasons to them – at least not in the synopsis or first chapter.


Phillipa Fioretti’s author website:

Phillipa Fioretti’s bio page


The Book of LoveThe Fragment of Dreams     Burning LiesRotten GodsStillwater CreekThe DeltaThe Forgotten Pearl

Writing Novels in Australia

5 Comments Post a comment
  1. Spot on, Phillipa, and of course time poor publishing staff aren’t alone. Readers will do exactly the same thing. There was some very interesting research floating around the internet a couple of weeks ago about why readers didn’t finish books. A poor beginning was right up there on the list!

    August 1, 2013
  2. I do agree but oh dear, poor authors everywhere! Just last week I was reading a blog about the virtues of adding all those lovely descriptive words to power up your nouns! LOL As is the case always, find the advice you love, mix it up, or whatever, but make it your own and be consistent throughout your manuscript. Great post Phillipa.

    August 1, 2013
  3. Oh yes! Helene, and I’m one of those readers who knows from the first few pages if I’m going to toss the book aside or not. I’m ruthless and lots of us readers are!

    August 2, 2013
  4. Jenn, I think getting the perfect balance is where the art lies. Restraint, but not too much. I don’t like books that don’t help me form the pictures in my head, and I don’t like books that do all the work for me. I’m a difficult customer! And I agree with you about consistency

    August 2, 2013

Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. Month In Review (July 2013) | Writing Novels in Australia

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: